Bonjour Leminou

Underneath of my soul

by Debhiekitty - May 07, 2020

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by Debhiekitty - May 07, 2020

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Good bye 2019 "Time heals all wounds"

by Debhiekitty - April 19, 2020

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by Debhiekitty - January 08, 2020

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Pain and Wound

by Debhiekitty - December 25, 2019

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The last post that I will write about you

by Debhiekitty - August 14, 2019

It's still hurts, that will be the first line for this post.

I don't know where to start and where will I end this.

I still remember everything about us, everything that we built together, every dreams that we had. I love you and i hated it so much. you really don't deserved to be loved.

........

You don't know about how much I suffer because of you, because of how much I loved you.

I still love you (I’m not gonna lie that I still think about you every day and I still have this moment when I think of you and cry). I was really happy back then, when we were together but that attitude of yours made me think if is it worth it to be with you? is it?

you said that I am the best thing that ever happened to you. But, what happened? I tested you if you can wait and court me again. Nah, you look for someone else you fucking liar. I thought you love me more than anything else? you chatted your fucking ex and what did you said? everything that you did to her in the past was because of me? oh no... you liar! its because of yourself! you flirt

maybe your were like that because

You know how much I love you, I choose you between our child and you, you you. what have you done? you look for an abortion pills and recommended it to me? you said if I did not do it you will stop your study? what choice do I have? you are a graduating student back then. I fucking choose you because I love you more than anything else but you did not appreciate it.

We made something together but why the heck are you scared to face your responsibility? every love that I have turns into hatred but I don't know why i still long for your fucking presence.

i have all of this regret because of you. It keeps haunting ne, drowning ne into the depth of despair. I left someone who truly love me just to be with you. Someone who will do everything for me.

I wish you nothing but despair.

thank you for leaving me this scar, this wound.

maybe someday I will love someone without thinking all of this regret.

Love,

debhie

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I'm sorry, I'm not the girl that you used to know

by Debhiekitty - February 08, 2019

I'm really sorry for being so difficult, difficult to love and understand.

I'm sorry if I cannot be the same person that you once knew.

you changed me, I changed you. All the things that happened today is not your fault.

Maybe it is just me. The "me" that you don't know right now, the new me. Sorry if I can't fulfill the promises that I said before. Everything is not in place, everything is broken right now. I cannot be the same person that you knew, the same person that you love all these years.

My life is a mess and I am a mess and miserable. You saved me before but right now you can't.

I'm drowning with all of these negative thoughts and emotions, emotions that built a wall between us.

No one can save me right now, even you.

By the way, I really don't know why do you keep holding on? what's the purpose that? why are you being a martyr? I wanna know the real reason behind it.

I lied, I cheated on you, I hurt you.

I did everything for you to hate me.... HATE ME AND LEAVE ME.

but

whyyyyy!????

why are you still here?

Is it really love that makes you stay? or is it the thought and the regret for wasting your time all these years that we've been together?

I want you to leave me, leave me alone.

I don't want to hurt you anymore, I don't want to break you into pieces.

I once made you my world, you'd been my whole world, everything revolves around you.

But there's really no certain in this world. Everything changes, even my love and feelings for you.

Lemme me just say this,

This is not something that will keep us together again. Maybe this is something that will hurt and make the both of us cry.

We thought that we're meant to be but we're not.

Thank you for everything that you did in our relationship, Thank you for making me feel loved and unloved at the same time.

Thank you for loving me despite of all the flaws that I have. Thank you for every moments that you make me feel alive

But, I really am sorry

I need you to let go, to let go on everything that happened between us. I don't want to hurt you anymore. I don't want to be a bad person anymore.

Good bye and thank you.

-Debhie

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Underneath of my soul

...

Good bye 2019 "Time heals all wounds"

Pain and Wound

The last post that I will write about you

I'm sorry, I'm not the girl that you used to know

Debhie Kitty

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